Long story short many years ago I took a solo trip to Brazil and stayed at a hostel for about 2 months. I met so many people from all over the world and was the greatest experience of my life. This one guy from London and I became good friends while there. I went back home to NY back to my average life and we stayed in touch. About a year after he took a trip to the US with is friend and decided to meet me while in NY to catch up.
I have not really talked to him since besides a few likes back and forth on social media
Mind you this was many years ago, out of the blue he messaged me recently and I was happy to hear from him. I was going through a tough time and he did not realize it at the time but I was grateful just to talk to someone and shoot the shit. He asked how I was doing, cut the conversation short then immediately asked me for a stupid favor, about if I knew anyone that could get him in a social club. I told him no I can't help, then that was basically it. Did not bother to further talk and catch up.
After that I decided to block him
Was I wrong?

My partner and I are no longer together. We shared an apartment but I’m taking over the apartment. We live in a rent stabilized building in Queens NY. Our lease ended back in 2017 so we’ve been paying the same amount since 2016. When we approach our landlord, does he have the ability to increase rent to what’s common in our area, for instance it’s 2500 for a one bedroom apartment, or would he be able to increase by the 4% per the lease agreement? Unsure how this all works. He seems like a good landlord, never had an issue and rent was always paid on time. Just really like the area and I can’t afford more than an 4% increase. Currently we’re still paying 1625 a month. The break up was amicable too. If this is the wrong place to post this, sorry!
Edit: it will be my name in the new lease. My ex is willing to wait a few months before we approach our landlord. He’s currently moving out of state. If this matters.

I ask because it seems to good to be true. Used 2022 Tiguan 29,000 miles. Financed 20,500 at 7.84% for 75 months. Monthly payments at $349.
The first time they came around they had a total finance of 23,500.
Advertised price: $22,900 Traded in an old mini copper for $4000

TLDR: my gf (MTF) just came out as a trans woman around the middle of April this year and ever since I’ve told my family it’s gone downhill since then. My family is showing their true colors and I need advice for how to deal with them / (possibly) get away from them.
For context, I’m (20 cis Female) about to be a junior in college, as is my (19 year old) gf, and neither of our families have been accepting. We live in TX, so I already don’t like it here. I took some time to make sure I was ok w the change my gf is going through, and in fact, I’m more happy w our relationship than before because I’ve always favored girls over guys. But my family is a different story. My parents were mostly accepting, though they worried about how my life might be harder in the future because I am with a trans person. I am currently visiting my grandparent in AR and when I told them about it, they (and my aunt) ganged up on me and tried to convince me to transfer schools. My grandmother called my gf “disgusting” and “unnatural “ even though she is a docent at a very liberal museum. She threatened to take away my cell service if I stay w this person and constantly makes assumptions about what I want and what my girlfriend wants.
My other set of grandparents don’t know about my gf’s transition (yet? Not sure if I should tell them.) and I don’t know how they would react. They’re usually a lot less accepting than my AR grandparents (appeared) to be.
I really really don’t know what to do at this point. My whole life I believe I have had depression though my family has always written me off as overreacting to things and being melodramatic. When I am w my gf though, sure things are stressful at times (especially bc we’re in college) but we are happy together and we support each other. I do own a car, and so does my gf, so I could drive if I need to, and I did just get back from a trip to NY so I just made some friendly connections there.
I really thought I could trust my family, and I know they are all older and come from a different generation w different mindsets but I really don’t know if I can ever fully trust them again.
I’m already looking at NM and CO as states to move to (thought I’m not sure when I should), even before my gf came out. If you were in this situation what would you do?
(Also please don’t repost or report this anywhere—I’m already very paranoid that this post may somehow end up being seen by my family even though none of them are on Reddit)

This was actually pretty mellow for one of my dreams since I have frequent nightmares. I was napping mid day when it happened.
I got a job at a general store near a river. It mostly sold unique drinks and snacks. I had only been working there for about a week, but I enjoyed it. One day the owner (an old man) comes up to me. He mentions that the place isn’t making enough sales. He said he was likely going to shut it down and to start looking for a new job. This was distressing to me, because I was broke and liked the new job I had. Once my shift was over I went down to the river, and for some reason I wished to save the store. Suddenly there was a flash and I was in the same spot, but different. Some things around were missing or not there before. I went to the store, and the whole strip of stores were different now.
The store I had been working at was now a diner. For some reason, the diner was in a house rather than a business building. I saw people I don’t know as well as my mother, working to serve a few tables. For some reason I went into the garage to discover it was converted into a kitchen. My mother didn’t recognize me, and everything looked retro, like I’d gone into the past. I got asked why I walked into the kitchen, and in a panic, claimed I thought it was an office, and that I was looking for a job. The women in the kitchen looked sad before responding, then told me the diner would shut down soon. They said their most popular dish was one with a local fish that was hard to catch. I was told if I could catch any to sell they would pay me well and be very grateful.
Not knowing what else to do now that I was suddenly in the past, I went to the river. I tried to wish to go home and I heard the river say “You can’t go home until you save the store”. At this point I figured yeah that river is probably evil and this is dumb. Still I asked to join some people on a large boat to fish. They accepted and even had fishing supplies they’d allow me to use. We went down the river for a long time as I tried to catch some fish. I could see the fish following us, but every time I tried to catch one they’d eat the bait, hook and all. A few kids aboard the boat told me if I wanted to catch that type of fish I was doing it wrong. They told me I had to go into the water and use my arm as bait. I didn’t want to do that. Soon though the boat began to sink. I tried to escape but got sucked down with the boat. I passed out and when I came to the kids from the boat were telling me we had to catch a train.
The rest of the dream I was trying to catch up to the kids as they rushed to a rural train stop in the woods near the river. I never caught up and saw them get on the train without me. No clue where the train was for but it left and I was left lost in the woods. Then I woke up.

A year ago the NY city I live in Water Dept came onto my property and dig up a small landscaped retaining wall, without notice or justification, and has since failed to repair it. I filed a claim with the City and have gone back and forth for a resolution. There hasn’t been communication from the City Counsel since December when I rejected their meager offer of $700 to repair something I provided a quote from a landscaper of over $12,000 to repair. What do I need to submit to file a small claims suit? I know I have to do it this month and I’ll only get up to $5000 but I think I’m out of options if I don’t want to be out of pocket any more money.

A classic but i am gonna write it anyway, i want to get it off my chest i guess... I met this girl a while ago(March) and everything was going smoothly, but one month ago she told me that she has to leave earlier this year for work(she works in a different city at a hotel-only in summer months usually). No problem from my part obviously at that point.She left and for 2 days we didn't had any contact. I initiated first and called her , we chatted for about 30+ minutes, everything seemed normal until the very end of the convo when she told me that the next 10 days will be really difficult and busy for her and that she will not be available to call-text. I am not gonna lie that was a bit strange for me ( to say at least) . Anyway 3 days past with no contact (needless to say i was thinking about her all the f day but also wanted to respect what she told me) . After that i texted her a funny meme, and asked her if everything was ok. She responded 16+ hours later with just "yea everything ok". I tried to continue the conversation but she was replying with one liners(really low effort )for the next 2 days. So i took the decision to not text her again for some days and see what happens Days past (maybe 5-6) and no sign from her. No call no text. I was trying to distract my self with work, activities etc but .... But.. you know the drill. I was thinking her all the time. So once again i texted her two messages(one funny, one about her). 18+ hours later the only thing she did was to react to them(we were chatting on viber). Just that ,react. At that point i didn't know what to do or say, she was obviously not into the convo anymore so i just... Left it right there. The next days i was hoping that she will text me or call me but.. you guessed right she didn't(neither i). And here we are 3 weeks later with me still thinking about her, not knowing what the hell to do. What you guys think? What should i do? Even after 3 weeks am still thinking about her. I know the answer but i cant wrap ny head around this.

So I'm 19 years old and since I was a baby I got sick every flu season. I just have a bad immune system. Last month I got quite sick and I even had to take antibiotics as a cure for my couphing. I got an xray and an ultrasound exam as my doctor suggested(everything was normal). Now almost a month later I am in the beginning of ny jniversity semester and I get pretty tired almost every day due to studying and not sleeping well. Also I am working out and not eating enough. So I got sick again. 3 days ago I had a sorethroat(lasted for a day), then I got running and stuff nose for 2 days(3rd almost today, I'm feeling way better) and today couphing started and it's pretty intense. So intense that I can't fall asleep. Any help? How can I get back up fast? I'm eating quite a lot(rich diet full of nutrients) and trying to get some good sleep. Anything else that could help get me back on feet fast? Thanks:)

Monday, May 22 - Sunday, May 28

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I’m looking for a work hard play hard kind of school (in the sense of having rigorous academics and party life)
I prefer lacs over big research schools but that’s not a must
I’m thinking a student body of 10k but that’s not a rigid number (I definitely don’t want a small school though)
I really want a diverse student body
It has to be a school in either the northeast or the southeast and preferably near the coast
Ideally a school in the suburbs but close to a city
Some sense of prestige would be nice too
I have a 3.84 uw and a 4.28 w and I’m in the top 20% of my class, it should be noted my mom is a single mom of 3 and I’m the oldest so I spend a lot of time helping with my siblings, dk if that makes a difference but figured I should mention it
I’m planning to major in bio but not necessarily premed
I really love Emory but I don’t think I could get in there
Can someone let me know if I’m being unrealistic with my wants or if you have any schools that come to mind? I’m just starting the college search process and really need pointers (I’m a jr currently)

I am getting a drug test in CT very soon and I read that NY companies aren't allowed to test for THC but does that still apply if I schedule a test in CT? Is there anything I can do to make sure? I will definitely fail the test if I take it.

I am getting a drug test in CT very soon and I read that NY companies aren't allowed to test for THC but does that still apply if I schedule a test in CT? Is there anything I can do to make sure? I will definitely fail the test if I take it.

Live in NY. Looking to invest in an electric pool heater pump to give a couple months extra of swim time. I have an 11,000 gallon pool and was told by my local pool store that I need a 65k BTU unit. Problem is, those units are currently sold out online. Next pump up is 80k BTU, is it okay to purchase a pump that can heat 15,000 gallons or will I be bleeding money and energy by not waiting and sizing up?

Hello guys,
I’m interested in buying a used 2020 luxury vehicle for $60k with 19k miles..
My approach was to enter the dealership looking to put down $30-$35k and finance the rest over 72-84 months making payments of $400-500 a month..
With this, I wanted to see and ask if it was somehow possible if I can negotiate for a lower price since I’m placing such a high down payment with a credit score of around 730 with a co-signer?
I’m also planning to sell/trade in the car after 2 years
Please let me know, if this works or if there us a better approach to this situation where I can save more money and possibly even get a better deal
Much love and thank you for your time

My father in law has 2 fishes in a big aquarium, a blue gourami and a little fish, we live in NY, he is moving into a senior home and has to leave the fishes. They’re in not a great shape either and we have no room in our apartment for an aquarium, I would love to find a nice home for the fishes but I don’t know how. Any tips? I just don’t wanna abandon it or give it to someone who is not gonna take care of them.

In July 2021, YouGov asked 3000 U.S. adult citizens to share their favorability on all 45 presidents. You can see the results here. They paint an interesting picture of how Americans perceive their presidents.
Now, what if we used those results to estimate how controversial each president is? I thought that would be a fun experiment, so I took some time to devise a formula that could give some kind of "controversy score" using the approval and disapproval ratings of a given subject.
The first task to define what "controversy" means and what a "controversy score" should represent. A common misconception is that "controversy" is more or less synonymous with "unpopularity", which is not true. Rather, "controversy" is the level of division around a subject; in more mathematical terms, the lack of difference between the approval and disapproval of that subject. In presidential terms, a president with 50% approval and 50% disapproval is a controversial president. A president with 100% disapproval is not, because everyone is in agreement about their negative opinion of him.
Though this is probably the initial approach for many, measuring controversy is unfortunately not as simple as measuring the difference between approval and disapproval. At first glance, this may seem like a good idea, with a 50-50 president (the most controversial) having a difference of 0 (the minimum possible output), and a 100-0 or 0-100 president (the least controversial) having a difference of 100 (the maximum possible output), and everyone else being somewhere in between. It would then be intuitive to rank the presidents by controversy score on a spectrum of 0 (most controversial) to 100 (least controversial).
But this only works when there are only approval and disapproval choices, which is not the case in our poll. The poll has six choices: "very favorable", "somewhat favorable", "somewhat unfavorable", "very unfavorable", "don't know", and "have not heard of them". Even if we combine the first two into "approve", and the next two into "disapprove", we are still left with two troublesome variables that substantially disrupt our math. If we stick to the plan of simply measuring the difference between approval and disapproval, and ignoring the other variables, we will find that a president who has 50% approval, 50% disapproval, and 0% "don't know" is just as controversial as a president who has 0% approval, 0% disapproval, and 100% "don't know", with both having differences of 0. This is obviously nonsense, so our formula needs to be adjusted.
It took some messing around and a good deal of research to find a formula that accounts for this. I ran into a lot of complicated statistical examples and explanations online, most of which went over my head. The simplest example I could find was C = (A*D)/A-D, where A is approval, D is disapproval, C is controversy score, 0 ≤ A ≤ 100, 0 ≤ D ≤ 100, and A + D ≤ 100. This seemed mostly alright, disregarding the risk of dividing by 0 if A and D were equal, which could be resolved with a slight adjustment to C = (A*D)/(A-D+1). This was a much better formula than the initial C = A-D.
From here, it was just a matter of controlling the range of outputs. C = (A*D)/(A-D+1) resulted in 0 ≤ C ≤ 2500, which was a bit too high of a range. I found by applying the results of that poll to this formula that the numbers got much more spread out as they got bigger, so I put the formula into a square root to curb this effect somewhat. C = sqrt((A*D)/(A-D+1)) returned 0 ≤ C ≤ 50, which was much better. To reduce the range to 0 ≤ C ≤ 10, I considered simply dividing the output by 5, but this resulted in C < 5 for all but 2 presidents. With some more tinkering, I found C = sqrt((0.4*A*D)/(A-D+10)), which also returns 0 ≤ C ≤ 10, to be more satisfactory.
To calculate the controversy score for these presidents, I put all their approval and disapproval ratings into a file called scores.txt, with each line having the format "N:A/D" where N is name, A is approval, D is disapproval, 0 ≤ A ≤ 100, 0 ≤ D ≤ 100, and A + D ≤ 100:

Washington:70/10 Adams:46/11 Jefferson:62/15 Madison:39/9 Monroe:29/12 JQA:44/9 Jackson:34/29 MVB:15/14 WHH:18/14 Tyler:14/14 Polk:16/17 Taylor:16/13 Fillmore:11/14 Pierce:15/15 Buchanan:15/21 Lincoln:80/9 Johnson:24/25 Grant:44/15 Hayes:18/15 Garfield:20/14 Arthur:13/13 Cleveland:21/18 Harrison:16/14 McKinley:18/15 TR:62/12 Taft:21/19 Wilson:32/25 Harding:15/23 Coolidge:24/19 Hoover:26/31 FDR:58/17 Truman:51/14 Eisenhower:58/11 JFK:73/14 LBJ:37/35 Nixon:27/57 Ford:41/30 Carter:45/32 Reagan:54/31 Bush Sr.:44/44 Clinton:45/42 Bush Jr.:43/43 Obama:54/41 Trump:39/54 Biden:47/44 

I then wrote a short C++ program that could read this file and output the controversy scores, in descending order, into a new file called results.txt:

#include  #include  #include  #include  #include  //written by u/xSiberianKhatru2 //rows in scores.txt must be in format "N:A/D", where N is name, A is approval, D is disapproval int main() { std::fstream f; std::vector> v; std::string s; f.open("scores.txt"); while(getline(f, s)){ std::pair p; p.first = s.substr(0, s.find(':')); double a = stof(s.substr(s.find(':') + 1, s.find('/'))); double d = stof(s.substr(s.find('/') + 1)); p.second = sqrt(0.4*a*d/(abs(a - d) + 10)); //will be between 0 and 10 v.push_back(p); } f.close(); //bubble sort *trollface* for(int i = 0; i < v.size() - 1; i++){ for(int j = 0; j < v.size() - i - 1; j++){ if(v[j].second < v[j + 1].second) swap(v[j], v[j + 1]); } } f.open("results.txt", std::fstream::out); for(int i = 0; i < v.size(); i++) f << i + 1 << std::fixed << std::setprecision(2) << ". " << v[i].first << " - " << v[i].second << std::endl; f.close(); return 0; } 

And this gave me the following ranking of controversy scores:

1. Bush Sr. - 8.80 2. Bush Jr. - 8.60 3. Biden - 7.98 4. Clinton - 7.63 5. LBJ - 6.57 6. Obama - 6.21 7. Trump - 5.80 8. Jackson - 5.13 9. Carter - 5.00 10. Ford - 4.84 11. Johnson - 4.67 12. Hoover - 4.64 13. Reagan - 4.50 14. Wilson - 4.34 15. Nixon - 3.92 16. Taft - 3.65 17. Coolidge - 3.49 18. Cleveland - 3.41 19. Polk - 3.14 20. Pierce - 3.00 21. Hayes - 2.88 22. McKinley - 2.88 23. Buchanan - 2.81 24. Tyler - 2.80 25. FDR - 2.78 26. Harding - 2.77 27. MVB - 2.76 28. Harrison - 2.73 29. WHH - 2.68 30. Garfield - 2.65 31. Grant - 2.60 32. Arthur - 2.60 33. Jefferson - 2.55 34. Taylor - 2.53 35. Truman - 2.47 36. JFK - 2.43 37. Monroe - 2.27 38. TR - 2.23 39. Fillmore - 2.18 40. Adams - 2.12 41. Eisenhower - 2.12 42. Washington - 2.00 43. Lincoln - 1.89 44. JQA - 1.88 45. Madison - 1.87 

This is a very interesting output, and I think there's a lot to be observed from it. The modern presidents are mostly at the top, the unknown ones are mostly in the middle, and the uniformly popular ones are mostly at the bottom, which seems about right. Most of the presidents are still C < 5; this makes sense, as most of the presidents had high "don't know" responses in the poll. Washington and Lincoln, the popular presidential giants, are comfortably near the bottom.
There are also a few problems. Few would agree that Bush Sr. is the most controversial president. This is because we don't just define controversy in terms of approval and disapproval; we put a lot of weight into how much a president gets discussed when deciding if he's controversial, something neither the poll nor our formula takes into account. The number of people who have heard of Bush Sr., and who have concrete opinions of him, is not terribly far from those who have heard of and have concrete opinions of Trump and Biden. But these opinions are generally quiet, and rarely the topic of heated arguments, something our formula doesn't take into account.
Despite these shortcomings, I think this was a fairly good effort at finding a measurable way to determine how controversial our presidents are. Of course, this formula can be applied to a lot more than just presidents, but I've left it at that for now.

I live in NY. I am a special education teacher. A former student who graduated several years ago spams me on social media. He makes multiple accounts using his name, the names of people I know, even using my own name and pictures. Reporting him to the platforms does nothing. He first started doing this in 2017. When he messages me he sends hundreds of messages, usually just his name over and over, but occasionally emoji stickers or pictures of himself. The latest of which were shirtless. Every time I have asked him to stop and/or blocked him. A few months ago I suspended some of my social media accounts to try to slow him down. It didn’t work. He continues to annoy me with this. I want him to stop. What is the best legal course of action?

The tweet that brought us to where we are today.
It's not just about her commitment to the grift. It's about her outsize ego, confidence and balls of steel.
Imagine that you've been living in NYC for several years (moved there from....BOSTON). There are lots of people who know you in NY and in Boston. One day you come back from a week long Spanish holiday and inform people who have known you for years as Hilary from Boston that your name is different. You've also dyed your hair back and gotten a membership at the local tanning salon. But you insist that you've always had olive skin and dark hair. Don't believe your lying eyes you tell anyone who questions you. Moreover, you have a newly acquired foreign accent and a severe case of ESL. You don't care that everyone knew you just a week prior as Hilary from Boston. You have no worries that anyone will call your bluff. You are totally comfortable in your grifter skin.
Now that takes some real cojones, a total lack of the shame gene and a staggering level of confidence.
You nab a well-known aging actor under the guise of being a spicy Spanish/Latina senorita. He spreads your Spanish origin story far and wide on the red carpet, in magazine interviews and on TV talk shows. Everyone now knows you as Alec Baldwin's bendy yoga teacher from Spain. There are tons of people out there who could out you as a fraud. People in Boston. People in NY. Close and distant family members. But you carry on without a care in the world and encourage the spread of your lies. You even bring the Spanish/Latina cosplay to church for your wedding ceremony in front of 40 fake Spanish relatives and your horrified parents.
Ball. Huge balls.
After your marriage you branch out to become a Spanish entertainment correspondent and a health and wellness expert even though you lack the proper qualifications. You and your husband claim you not only "helped open" Yoga Vida, but that you're a co-owner. It's lies upon lies of course, but you are completely confident that no one will reveal your secrets. How?
Balls. Balls. Balls.
You travel to Spain with your husband. While there you continue lying about your Spanish origin story and your Spanish family members. You talk to Spaniards in Spanish and spew these lies in complete confidence. You wouldn't be able to answer the simplest questions about which Spanish schools you attended and which street you lived on. But you carry on in complete confidence.
Again, just incredible balls of steel.
After you are outed as grifter of the year you double down on your lies and your fake accent. That takes some confidence and balls balls balls. Incredible.
I can't imagine what it would be like to have enthusiastically lived a lie for 15+ years, knowing that anyone could blow it wide open in an instant. I can't imagine dragging my family and innocent children into the grift and forcing them to play along.
It just takes enormous balls and a great deal of confidence, and that's the only aspect of Hilaria Baldwin that I find impressive.