Dr limon homestead opening date

I'm done dating

2023.03.28 10:12 4794th I'm done dating

Backstory: Living in Kazakhstan is a challenge for a queer millennial. You can't just be yourself. You have to maintain an alternative personality or a slightly veiled one to avoid unnecessary attention from religious fanatics and right-winged citizens. Although all my friends and family know and accept me, I consider myself a "semi-closeted queer" because I don't feel the need to wave a flag and tell everyone I'm gay.
It's been three years since my last long-term relationship ended due to constant miscommunication. Drained and exhausted, I leaned toward my career and mental health. After almost a year of therapy, with anti-depressants and tranquilizers to overcome anxiety and heal some of the wounds from my past, I've found my piece and decided that it's time to try and date again. Little I knew that dating will not be the same. I realized my pattern of driven guys with toxic traits. Although I'm still attracted to them, I can spot red flags and stop paying them guys my attention.
In 2022 I matched with a guy on Tinder. That was the first time I agreed to date a guy younger than me (thanks to anti-depressants). It felt like Craig David's song "7 days" - fast-paced. We both felt a velocity gain, discussed it, and agreed to continue. After a month of dating, we decided to part ways. I became a mother, he became my dependent child. After that, I, again, escaped any interactions and closed myself from meeting anyone else. "I opened up, and tried to date, but it didn't work out. Now, back to the lair" was my justification that I accepted and disappeared from the radar.
This year I downloaded Tinder, again 🙄. Matching guys, talking to them, and getting only a few mediocre dates felt horrible. I was vulnerable, open, and carrying, but no one appreciated it. One of the dates tried to get straight into my pants, and the second one blamed me for being me 🤣🥲
After the last fiasco, I've decided to do what I know best - "crawl back into the lair and hide from dating". So, my question is: "Is it harder or easier to meet/date guys in the US/Europe?". Not asking about hookups, though.
P.S. Although my experiences and story might not be relevant to you, I'd love to hear your thoughts, if you feel like sharing them here or in DMs :)
submitted by 4794th to lgbt [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:11 pontaloms Why has my casual relationship ending hit me so hard?

I’m mid 20M and up until a few days ago I was seeing a girl for about 2 months. Sleeping together, going out for drinks, hanging out. Things like that.
I asked her after we slept together on the second date what she was looking for and she said she wasn’t sure. Said she wasn’t sure if she could do serious and didn’t want to be treated like shit again. But she liked seeing me and wasn’t sure really.
We kept seeing eachother and honestly I saw quite a few red flags. I’m very against drugs and she did coke at parties so I just kinda knew that was gonna be a big issue for me. I had kinda accepted this won’t help long term.
But as we hung out more I got more attached and I think I kinda hoped it would change. There were a few moments that made me think she liked me more than just casual.
Then a few days ago she just texted me after not replying for a day and said she didn’t have time to commit and had said she didn’t want serious, felt it had got serious, and didn’t want to waste my time
I just replied ‘fair enough’ and we didn’t speak again.
I don’t know why. But it’s really upset me. I feel like somethings wrong with me. I asked her if I said anything and she said I didn’t. But I can’t help feeling like I’m just being lied to and really I suck. Like after all this she couldn’t get attached like I did? Maybe I get attached too fast and shouldn’t have but I couldn’t help it.
Why has this affected me so badly?
Tl;dr casual relationship ended and even though it shouldn’t it really upset me and not sure why
submitted by pontaloms to relationships [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:06 Mydiamondhands 26m Struggling with a single unimportant event - months of spiralling thoughts about gf 23m

Hello everyone, I’m going to cut to the chase as I’m at wits end with how bad things have gotten: I met my gf almost a year ago. A year before that she had a hookup with a guy. He told her right after that he had a girlfriend.
A couple months into us dating, one night she doesn’t talk to me all day or reply to my goodnight message. She answers around 2am. The following day she says she had a conversation with a friend that needed to be had. Fast forward a few months & I ask about that time: she says it’s was with this hookup, they had dinner and she needed to tell him she was feeling used & how bad she felt overall.
I’m feeling horrible because so many questions are racing in my head: I don’t understand why she wouldn’t tell me before? I don’t understand why she had time to see someone for dinner but not to talk to me all day? Why did dinner end so late? Why didn’t she answer my messages during this dinner?
She said nothing happened. I believe her but in my obsessive thoughts I’m so embroiled into negativity.
We’ve discussed many times and she has been very open to conversation. I love her very much and I don’t want to lose her because I’m obsessing over something that could be inconsequential.
Do you guys see any solutions? What can I do? Do I need to have a conversation again? How do I approach it in order to solve it with her?
submitted by Mydiamondhands to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:05 Affectionate_Jump_61 I moved on faster after my exBPDgf broke up with me. How would that make her feel?

I knew the end was coming so I started to check out the relationship a few weeks before breakup and kept my options open with other girls. She sent a breakup text and I left her hanging and never responded to this day. Been in NC ever since too. We aren't friends on FB, but she can see my public posts. I started moving on and seeing other girls 3 days after breakup. I posted pics of me having fun, going out, dates with other girls (I never showed the girls in pics, but I posted our 2 drinks together, another pic weeks later a piece of her purse was in pic, pretty much tell Im with a girl, but still a mystery, could be a date, freind, gf, who knows, who cares), my new kitten I adopted, NBA game, parades, cool bars, concerts, etc. She saw all that and blocked me 3 weeks later. But I didn't post for her, it helped me move on. So currently I keep posting stuff like normal people do and I think her friend checks out my page every now and then. Im jw, I wonder how that made her feel. Was she shocked that I never reacted or replied to her and I moved on so fast? Did it piss her off? Jealous? Envious? Honestly if I were her and saw that, I'd actually be shocked and confused. But I don't owe her anything and I'm single.
I know alot of people here don't move on fast after the breakup and the BPD ex moves on so fast. But I wonder how she feels when it was the other way around.
Her posts currently are all going downhill after she broke up with me, all depressing stuff, ❤️‍🩹 healing symbols, etc. So my life is going up and forward while hers is going down the drain.
submitted by Affectionate_Jump_61 to BPDlovedones [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:05 AutoModerator [Get] Dan Koe – Digital Economics Masters Degree Full Course Download

[Get] Dan Koe – Digital Economics Masters Degree Full Course Download
Get the course here: https://www.genkicourses.com/product/dan-koe-digital-economics-masters-degree/
Dan Koe – Digital Economics Masters Degree

https://preview.redd.it/4w9tt8nthyoa1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=aaacbd9fdb837f07a27a37c49cd406115367f9e4

What You Get

Phase 0) Digital Economics 101

The Digital Economics 101 module will open 1 week prior to the cohort start date.This is an onboarding module that will get you up to speed so we can get straight into the material.This will be required to finish before the start date.
  • Gain a deep understanding of all of the pieces in the digital economy.
  • Learn about the future of media and code — the front-end and backend of the internet — so you can focus your efforts.
  • Understand digital leverage, distribution, no-code tools, and digital assets so you can take part in the mental & financial wealth transfer.

Phase 1) Creating A Meaningful Niche

Every day I hear people going on and on about trying to find their niche.I also hear people talking about how they don’t know how to combine what they love talking about with what will sell.You already have the answer. You just don’t have the clarity.
  • Develop a long-term strategy to create your own niche — meaning you don’t have to worry about your “competition” playing status games.
  • Discover your life’s work, curiosities, and obsessions. I see too many people that are uncertain about this for years.
  • Cultivate and turn your vision, goals, and values into a brand that attracts an audience you love interacting with (and that will buy from you, and only you).

Phase 2) Content Strategy

There is one thing that separates those who make it in the digital economy and those who don’t.It’s the quality, articulation, and perceived originality of their content.The content you post has to make sense to the people you attract.Everyone has a different voice and tone that they resonate with. That they are congruent with and trust.It has to change their thought patterns or behavior — that’s what makes you memorable.That’s what separates you from the sea of people posting surface-level copy-cat style posts.Example and putting my money where my mouth is:
  • Become an expert-level speaker or writer on the topics you care about.
  • Never run out of content ideas for your posts or promotions (without using content templates — that’s how you stay a commodity).
  • Create posts, blogs, tweets, images, and videos that resonate with other’s on a deep level. People will actually ask you how you got so good at what you do.
  • Separate yourself from the ocean of B-tier creators that struggle to sell their products, services, andhave their ideas stick in the head of their audience.
  • Implement our Epistemic Research Method — which is just a fancy way of saying scientific research method… but it’s for researching your mind to craft brilliant content and product ideas.

Phase 3) Crafting Your Offer

Most people are sitting on a goldmine of skills, experience, and knowledge (that they can use to help people 1-2 steps behind them).That is what people pay for.Considering 95% of the market are beginners… if you are good at something, you can help them get to your level (no matter how “basic” you think the information is).Do you not watch basic content all day anyway? People don’t want new information, they want to be reminded of what works.
  • Use our Minimum Viable Offer strategy to start monetizing immediately (and have something to improve over time, rather than procrastinating until it’s perfect).
  • Have a strategy for reducing the time you spend working over time (as you build leverage and improve your offer).
  • Know how to create your own customers from the audience you are building, instead of “finding” the right customer for your offer.
  • Take the guesswork out of building coaching, consulting, or digital product offers.

Phase 4) Marketing Strategy

You aren’t making money because you aren’t promoting yourself or your offer.That is literally the only way to make money. Have something desirable and consistently put it in front of peoples’ faces.In Phase 4, I will show you how to systemize, automate, and be consistent with simple promotions.You will be able to make money without having the chance of forgetting to do it (or letting fear of failure get in the way).
  • Learn to sell on social media, in your writing, and across different platforms.
  • Have consistent sales coming in while focusing on your meaningful message (no need to sound salesy all the time).
  • Learn advanced automation strategies that you can implement at your own pace, especially once you validate your offer.

Bonus) The Creator Command Center

The Creator Command Center is a Notion template that houses all of the systems.This is how you will manage your brand, content, offer creation, marketing strategy, and systemized promotions for consistent sales.

Bonus) Live Product Build & Launch

In the first Digital Economics Cohort, I built out my course The 2 Hour Writer.I have videos showing how I build it with the strategies in phase 3 and 4.There is a bonus module that shows how I had an $85,000 launch that resulted in my first $100K month.I did this to prove the strategies inside Digital Economics work if you stick to the plan.And, this past Black Friday, I blew my that monthly high out of the water in 4 days.That’s the power of these strategies if you stay consistent with your life’s work.
submitted by AutoModerator to GenkiCourses_2023 [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:04 Square_Hat517 (Reddit) WHere To WAtch "John Wick: Chapter 4" [ONLINE] For Free

Action Movie! Here’s options for downloading or watching John Wick: Chapter 4 streaming the full movie online for free on 123movies & Reddit,1movies, 9movies, and yes movies, including where to watch the anticipated Action movie at home. Is John Wick: Chapter 4 available to stream? Is watching John Wick: Chapter 4 on Disney Plus, HBO Max, Netflix, or Amazon Prime? Yes, we have found an authentic streaming option / service.
Watch Now: John Wick: Chapter 4 [ONLINE] For Free
Watch Now: John Wick: Chapter 4 [ONLINE] For Free
John Wick: Chapter 4 is by far the best of the four films starring Keanu Reeves as the eponymous hit man, the first of the cycle that I’d recommend—albeit with an asterisk. The new film (which opens Friday) has many of the same problems as its predecessors; although these problems are interesting, they’re far more fun to contemplate in the rearview mirror of thought than in the real-time forward motion of viewing. But something happens, fairly late in the game, that converts the film’s merely technical displays of bloody murder into something suspenseful and romantic, if no less silly. The details are too good to give away, but there’s no harm and much pleasure in considering how the movie climbs, slowly but surely, to that light-headed summit.

One of the curiosities of the John Wick series is that, as an entirely original creation dependent on no prior properties, it has nonetheless given rise to an alluring and self-perpetuating mythology of its own. The premise of Wick world is cleverly paranoiac, built around the tentacular connections between the crude underworld of contract killers and the shadowy overlords who keep them in action. That wicked authority is called the High Table; it dispenses orders to kill on pain of being killed, ratifies contracts for murder, and brokers the deals for bounty hunters. It commands John to kill, and it sets him up to be killed, but it also sets the tone of the movie. The High Table exemplifies a super-élite of secret societies with elaborate rites, deeply rooted aristocracies, a flaunting of mind-bending wealth, and the executive ruthlessness of a transnational shadow government that has the power to wreak havoc in public with impunity.

On 24th March 2023, Keanu Reeves starring JW4, is coming to your nearest theaters. This American neo-noir action thriller will be 169 minutes long and distributed by Lionsgate. Already, the official YouTube trailer is out, vibing fans' expectations!

If you are looking for online stream options for this film, you may get updates soon. Also, which platforms can you rely on to watch this newest chapter of John Wick? We will uncover the info here!

John Wick: Chapter 4 will be out on 24th March 2023 in the US! However, this fourth installment of John Wick was initially scheduled to release on 21st May 2021. Nevertheless, due to the Covid-19 pandemic, the whole shooting got delayed, which impacted the official screening too.

Also, the title cast- Reeves' had some agreements with The Matrix Resurrections (2021) at that period. In the meantime, John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023) official trailer was uploaded on YouTube on 10th November 2022 from Lionsgate Movies.

Is John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023) Streaming or in Theaters?

John Wick: Chapter 4 will first debut exclusively in theaters on Friday, March 24, 2023. It’s hard to believe that this is nearly two years later than its originally intended release date of May 21, 2021!

If you would rather wait to watch it from the comforts of home, keep reading below, so you can learn more about the movie’s streaming and home media release details.

When Is John Wick: Chapter 4 Streaming Online?

Streaming release dates can be quite unpredictable at times. Each streaming service has its own different practices in regard to when a new film can finally be released online, which may also be influenced by a film’s production company too. While John Wick: Chapter 4 is likely to be available for streaming on one of the major streaming platforms, its release date on streaming is still a bit of a mystery. It's a guessing game for now, but keep an eye on this space for future updates!

Where to Watch John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023) Online?

As of now, the only way to watch Avatar: The Way of Water is to head out to the movie theater when it releases on Friday, Dec. 16. You can find a local showing on Fandango.

Otherwise, you’ll just have to wait for it to become available to rent or purchase on digital platforms like Amazon, Apple, YouTube or Vudu, or available to stream on Disney+. Read on for more information.

Is John Wick 4 on Netflix?

The streaming giant has a massive catalog of television shows and movies, but it does not include ‘John Wick: Chapter 4.’ We recommend our readers watch other dark fantasy films like ‘The Witcher: Nightmare of the Wolf.’

Is John Wick: Chapter 4 on Hulu?

No, ‘John Wick 4’ is unavailable on Hulu. People who have a subscription to the platform can enjoy ‘Afro Samurai Resurrection’ or ‘Ninja Scroll.’

Is John Wick 4 on Amazon Prime?

Amazon Prime’s current catalog does not include ‘John Wick 4.’ However, the film may eventually release on the platform as video-on-demand in the coming months.fantasy movies on Amazon Prime’s official website. Viewers who are looking for something similar can watch the original show ‘Dororo.’

Is John Wick 4 on HBO Max?

No, John Wick 4 will not be on HBO Max since it’s not a Warner Bros. movie. The company previously released its movies on the streamer and in theaters on the same day. However, they now allow a 45-day window between the theatrical release and the streaming release.

Casts of John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023)

Can you imagine the very famous John Wick with Keanu Reeves? Expectedly, Keanu stars the title character- John Wick, with a bunch of other talented cast members, including Donnie Yen (Caine), Bill Skarsgård (Marquis), Laurence Fishburne (Bowery King), Hiroyuki Sanada (Shimazu).

What Is John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023) About?

Remember the story when John Wick first got introduced? He searched for a man who invaded his home and stole his belongings in chapter 1. Then, chapter 2 portrayed John Wick's mission to assassinate a target. Finally, we saw him fighting his way out of New York in the latest chapter of John Wick back in 2019.
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2023.03.28 10:02 AutoModerator [Share Course] Dan Koe – Digital Economics Masters Degree

[Share Course] Dan Koe – Digital Economics Masters Degree
Download Course link: https://www.genkicourses.com/product/dan-koe-digital-economics-masters-degree/
[Share Course] Dan Koe – Digital Economics Masters Degree
Size: 26.38 GB Delivery: MEGA
Delivery Time : Instantly

https://preview.redd.it/qksi5dusxroa1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=d4538317fe1268bcab3b4d3781f2911d5ece14fc

What You Get

Phase 0) Digital Economics 101

The Digital Economics 101 module will open 1 week prior to the cohort start date.This is an onboarding module that will get you up to speed so we can get straight into the material.This will be required to finish before the start date.

  • Gain a deep understanding of all of the pieces in the digital economy.
  • Learn about the future of media and code — the front-end and backend of the internet — so you can focus your efforts.
  • Understand digital leverage, distribution, no-code tools, and digital assets so you can take part in the mental & financial wealth transfer.

Phase 1) Creating A Meaningful Niche

Every day I hear people going on and on about trying to find their niche.I also hear people talking about how they don’t know how to combine what they love talking about with what will sell.You already have the answer. You just don’t have the clarity.

  • Develop a long-term strategy to create your own niche — meaning you don’t have to worry about your “competition” playing status games.
  • Discover your life’s work, curiosities, and obsessions. I see too many people that are uncertain about this for years.
  • Cultivate and turn your vision, goals, and values into a brand that attracts an audience you love interacting with (and that will buy from you, and only you).

Phase 2) Content Strategy

There is one thing that separates those who make it in the digital economy and those who don’t.It’s the quality, articulation, and perceived originality of their content.The content you post has to make sense to the people you attract.Everyone has a different voice and tone that they resonate with. That they are congruent with and trust.It has to change their thought patterns or behavior — that’s what makes you memorable.That’s what separates you from the sea of people posting surface-level copy-cat style posts.Example and putting my money where my mouth is:

  • Become an expert-level speaker or writer on the topics you care about.
  • Never run out of content ideas for your posts or promotions (without using content templates — that’s how you stay a commodity).
  • Create posts, blogs, tweets, images, and videos that resonate with other’s on a deep level. People will actually ask you how you got so good at what you do.
  • Separate yourself from the ocean of B-tier creators that struggle to sell their products, services, andhave their ideas stick in the head of their audience.
  • Implement our Epistemic Research Method — which is just a fancy way of saying scientific research method… but it’s for researching your mind to craft brilliant content and product ideas.

Phase 3) Crafting Your Offer

Most people are sitting on a goldmine of skills, experience, and knowledge (that they can use to help people 1-2 steps behind them).That is what people pay for.Considering 95% of the market are beginners… if you are good at something, you can help them get to your level (no matter how “basic” you think the information is).Do you not watch basic content all day anyway? People don’t want new information, they want to be reminded of what works.

  • Use our Minimum Viable Offer strategy to start monetizing immediately (and have something to improve over time, rather than procrastinating until it’s perfect).
  • Have a strategy for reducing the time you spend working over time (as you build leverage and improve your offer).
  • Know how to create your own customers from the audience you are building, instead of “finding” the right customer for your offer.
  • Take the guesswork out of building coaching, consulting, or digital product offers.

Phase 4) Marketing Strategy

You aren’t making money because you aren’t promoting yourself or your offer.That is literally the only way to make money. Have something desirable and consistently put it in front of peoples’ faces.In Phase 4, I will show you how to systemize, automate, and be consistent with simple promotions.You will be able to make money without having the chance of forgetting to do it (or letting fear of failure get in the way).

  • Learn to sell on social media, in your writing, and across different platforms.
  • Have consistent sales coming in while focusing on your meaningful message (no need to sound salesy all the time).
  • Learn advanced automation strategies that you can implement at your own pace, especially once you validate your offer.

Bonus) The Creator Command Center

The Creator Command Center is a Notion template that houses all of the systems.This is how you will manage your brand, content, offer creation, marketing strategy, and systemized promotions for consistent sales.

Bonus) Live Product Build & Launch

In the first Digital Economics Cohort, I built out my course The 2 Hour Writer.I have videos showing how I build it with the strategies in phase 3 and 4.There is a bonus module that shows how I had an $85,000 launch that resulted in my first $100K month.I did this to prove the strategies inside Digital Economics work if you stick to the plan.And, this past Black Friday, I blew my that monthly high out of the water in 4 days.That’s the power of these strategies if you stay consistent with your life’s work.
submitted by AutoModerator to Agency_Navigator_Gadz [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:01 Jakechelsea 7 Simple Evening Habits to Transform Your Morning Routine

Have you thought ‘tomorrow is the day, the day I finally get up early and attack the day, new day, new me’ and then the alarm goes off, you hit snooze and wake up the same time you always have? Of course you have, we all have.
Good intentions really don’t account for much, it’s our actions that determine our success or failure in becoming an early riser.
It wasn’t until I embarked on my own journey I realised that without changing my evening habits I could never change my morning habits.
By tweaking just a few habits before jumping into bed we can drastically increase our chances of waking up early and get our first big accomplishment of the day out of the way - not hitting snooze!
Here are the 7 super simple tweaks I have made to my evening routine that have enabled me to stick to my wake up time.
Read to the end to find the one thing that makes all 7 of these habits IRRELEVANT!

Reverse engineer your wake up time

‘Right that’s it, tomorrow I’m waking up at 6.30am and I’m attacking the day with vigour’. You’ve had this thought before right? And when you wake up 3 hours later, you instantly blame the alarm clock. ‘It didn’t go off! I slept right through it!’.
What actually happened is you were so tired you turned the alarm off and before your conscious brain could even kick in you were asleep again within 9 seconds and you totally forgot that this happened just a few hours ago.
We have all been there.
You didn’t reverse engineer your wake up time. See me, I need 8 hours. I can function on less but my body really does need a solid 8 hours. However, I typically fall asleep around midnight, sometimes around 1am if I’m particularly restless.
Now if I want to get up around 7am then I’m waking up after just 6ish hours of sleep. The amount of times I’ve smashed the snooze button and turned the alarm off in just 6 hours of sleep is staggering. I have ZERO discipline when I have a poor night's sleep.
My failure was that I didn’t reverse engineer my wake up time. I want to wake up at 7am and I need 8 hours, then I MUST be asleep by 11pm. I can safely say that whenever I’m asleep at 11pm then waking up at 7am is easy.
I backed up my clock and set a time I must be asleep by. Now for me, I take around 20 mins to fall asleep. So I have to be in bed at 10.40pm. If I fall asleep quicker than 20 mins then that’s a bonus. If it takes me 30 mins it’s not the end of the world. I can survive on 7 hours 50.
Our body clocks are different. Some people only need 6 hours, others need 9. Start at the time you want to wake up and back up your clock the amount of hours of sleep you need.
Want to wake up at 6am but you need 9 hours sleep, then you must be asleep by 9pm. Woke backwards from here. You might need to make dinner earlier or record your favourite show between 9 and 10 and watch it the next day.
In some cases, this is going to be difficult because of life and work commitments. So choose a wake up time that fits your lifestyle.
The important point here is to set your wake up time, recognise the time you must be asleep by and aim for that. But experiment with different wake up times and sleep times to find what works for you. We are all different.

Blocking blue light after 7pm

I just wrote an article called ‘The science of blocking blue light before bedtime’.
You can read this for why this is important. But a quick hack to block blue light on your iPhone is:
  1. Go to settings
  2. Display & Brightness
  3. Night Shift
  4. Slide the colour temperature to ‘More Warm’
I have set mine to block blue light between 7pm and 9am. This is a super simple hack to limit the amount of blue light you get before you go to sleep, which numerous scientific studies have found greatly improves sleep length and sleep quality.

Prepare for the first task of the day only

I recently wrote about how my jump rope workout plan faded when I forgot to prepare my workout clothes before I went to sleep.
The simple act of getting my workout shorts, top and socks out and having them ready for me to jump into made the jump rope workout a much easier habit to adopt.
Think about what the first thing you want to do is. Workout? Get your workout clothes ready. Walk the dog? Get your outfit including coat and scarf ready and put the dog lead on top of it.
There is a famous speech by Admiral William H. McRaven who emphasised making the bed. It was a win. The first win of the day. A small insignificant win that made it easier to complete more tasks and set the day up for a series of wins.
So focus only on the first task of the day and prepare your outfit the night before and when you wake up all you need to do is complete that task. By outfit, I’m obviously talking about clothes. But if you want your first task to be journaling, then get the pen and pad, write tomorrow’s date at the top and leave the pad open on the table ready for you.
You will be greatly surprised, as I was, at how easy it is to start the morning on the right foot just by preparing for the first task of the day.

No late meals or snacks

You know that feeling of climbing into bed with a stomach full of food, I find this uncomfortable and it makes me restless. All I can think about is how full I am.
I try to eat 2-2.5 hours before going to bed. This is enough time for my body to digest the food and I can sleep well fed.
Think about what you are asking your body to do when you eat late night snacks or go to bed right after a big meal. You’re asking your body to kick into gear and start breaking down the food for nutrients. We want the body and brain to be at rest so that we can fall asleep more easily.
Intermittent fasting is a great way to stop eating late night snacks. Choose one of the many apps, my personal favourite is ‘Zero’ and start eating during your eating window only. This will help to know when to eat and when not to eat.
Maybe one day I’ll do a breakdown on how IF affects sleep quality and patterns.

Pick up a book

This is a personal favourite. I love to read. One because I just enjoy learning new things (I’m a big non-fiction fan) but also because IT MAKES ME SLEEPY.
I read a kindle which means I’m not absorbing any blue light late at night, my wife reads a proper paperback. But both of our eyelids slowly begin to close after about 15 minutes and all of a sudden we are asleep.
I genuinely think reading is life’s cheat code and a form of time travel. If you read a book written in Ancient Greece you are literally travelling back in time to the mind of the person that wrote it.
But one of the hidden benefits of adopting a reading habit is that it helps me to unwind at the end of the day, away from my phone and social media and before I know it I’m asleep.
Pick up a book, any book that you fancy and for the final 15 mins of the day, just read it. You’ll soon see what I mean.

Set a Do Not Disturb schedule

Notifications are how apps like Facebook and Twitter make you become addicted to them.
WIthout notifications you probably wouldn’t think to open 75% of the apps you have installed on your phone.
The notification creates a trigger that turns into action.
Set a Do Not Disturb schedule on your phone, perhaps the same time you have your blue light block set for. During this time you won’t receive any notification pop ups. This helps in two ways:
For reasons we will explore another time, limiting the hours spent on our digital devices either side of going to sleep is hugely beneficial.
A great morning routine is one that doesn’t involve diving right into social media as soon as you wake up.
This is infinitely more difficult when there are tons of notifications from 10+ apps compelling us into action.
Setting the phone to Do Not Disturb is also great if you need to focus and be productive and much like the blue light blocking hack is super simple to start.
Bonus: The one thing that makes all 7 of these totally useless and irrelevant.
Going out after work for a few drinks? Going for a meal with a loved one and getting deep into a bottle of Merlot? Fancy a few cold cans on the sofa after a long stressful day?
I have found alcohol to be the biggest nullifier of the morning routine.
Yes you could still do these 7 things but the effects alcohol has on the length of sleep and how many good quality hours of sleep you get make it very hard to have discipline in the morning.
But that’s ok. You don’t need to stop drinking (unless you want to), but recognise that tomorrow you need a different approach. A later wake up time, a different morning task, whatever.
When I am out with work friends for a few drinks, I set my alarm to a more suitable wake up time simply because I know that the effect those few drinks have on me is going to make it difficult for me to rise as early as I would like.

Do the same 3 things before you go to sleep

Do the exact same things just before going to sleep.
For me, I clean my teeth, prepare my outfit for the next day, read a book, sleep.
I want to train my brain and body to recognise that I am about to fall asleep.
I choose those three actions as my cue to the brain to start getting prepared to fall asleep.
This mini-routine within my evening routine is as important as my entire routine. This consistency takes away any decision making I need to make and I can go through this mini-routine with ease.
Try it. And then experiment with doing something random one night and you will notice the difference in your ability to fall asleep. Then again, this might just be the effect it has on me! This is a journey of self-discovery and you should do the same!
So there you have it, 7 super simple evening habits you can adopt to set yourself up for early riser success.
How many of these do you do? Is there anything you recommend?

I’ve spent the past 3 months obsessing over my sleep, my wake up time and my morning routine.
And I’ve been able to influence my mood, productivity and find my purpose… and I feel like I’m only at the beginning.
I send two emails per week of things I learn about waking up early, morning routines and creating an intentional life.
It’s totally free to read and subscribe 🙏 - https://www.nomoresnooze.co/
submitted by Jakechelsea to morningroutine [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 10:00 Shakuro_com Barber Booking Mobile App

Barber Booking Mobile App submitted by Shakuro_com to Creative_Club_ [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:57 ShadowSlash__ 😶

😶 submitted by ShadowSlash__ to teenagersbuthot [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:54 heyjinji Feeling really anxious about coming out

Hi, I'm Jinji, and I recently turned 20.
I've been out about being non-binary to my closest friends for about 5 years now, but ever since I had not had tbe courage to come out to my family or socially and it has been taking a tool on me.
I remember the first time I felt confused about gender was when I was about 5. I had this horrible feeling everytime someone called me a girl, or even joke about me being a boy Nothing felt right and I felt so lonely, I felt like I was born with some kind of defect but couldn't really explain it.
I was so happy when I was about 8-9 and I found out about non-binary trans people. I finally have found a word to describe myself, even though I never cared much for labels, as well as I found out: I'm not the only one.
Suddenly I was thinking: what do I do now? How do I make myself more comfortable on my own body, clothes, life? My life never felt mine, really.
For context, I am the youngest of 3. My brother is 29 and my sister is 33. I wouldn't say my parents are the most open-minded ever, but I had the privilege to grow up in a pretty welcoming home when it comes to the LGBTQ+ community (my brother came out as openly gay when he was very young, and I also came out as bisexual when I was 13).
That being said, I remember a few times my mother has asked me "If you're a boy that's okay" "I wouldn't be mad at you if you weren't a girl" because I never tried to hide it in my looks (I always dressed and presented myself more to the masculine/androgynous side) and although I was very happy she would be supportive of me if I was actually binary-trans, I think she would mock me if I tried to explain to her who I really am.
For my siblings: my brother is very openly supportive of the trans community, on social media, uses inclusive language online and irl and I tried so many times to come out to him but I just don't have the courage to. My sister is a bit progressive but I think she would probably just say I'm weird or laugh it off.
I don't know, I've been feeling trapped for so long now. Hearing they call me by my deadname, on my workplace as well, even though my friends and closest people have known for so long too. I'm stuck.
Would appreciate some tips, feel free to share similar stories as well if you want to!
TL;DR: I'm 20, I have discovered I'm non-binary for more than 10 years now, been out to my closest friends for about 5 years but don't have the guts to come out to my mildly supportive family.
submitted by heyjinji to NonBinary [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:50 ch1ak1 How do I navigate a triggering situation with my co-worker who is giving me the silent treatment?

TL;DR My co-worker is giving me the silent treatment, for a mistake I made, I find the silent treatment really triggering
I have a co-worker that we will call "L", I have been working in this job for about a year and a half and for the year and a half we'd have out-of-work celebrations for birthdays and going aways. I wouldn't say we were particularly close, but I would consider us all close for co-workers. I had a really bad emotional flashback about a month ago that made me realize I had a lot of healing to do. It was rough, I wasn't able to go to work a few days (as I wasn't able to eat or sleep and was having anxiety attacks) and when I was at work I was close to tears. One of these days as I was leaving work with L, I said I've been struggling for a bit and he said let's go for a drink. The night was really nice! We both opened up about our trauma and he echoed a lot of what I was saying. We made plans to go out again the next Friday. I mentioned that I had a dinner with the head of our office before we planned to meet and asked if he was fine to meet after that and he was. When we went to the first bar it was really packed (and too noisy to chat) so we had a drink and went to the next. At the next bar there was a group of Lacrosse players who invited us to join them for the next round and mentioned there would be Korean Lacrosse players too (L is Korean). I asked if he wanted to join and he said it was a new experience so let's go. L doesn't speak too much English (like the Lacrosse players) and so I was a bit worried (I did want to join them dont get me wrong), but we went. At the next place we had another round of all-you-can-drink and there was a lot of conversation that was happening in English. The aforementioned Korean Lacrosse players apparently went to bed early and so I could see that L wasn't the most comfortable. We finished up and I convinced L to come with us to the next round which was at a club. We danced and drank and as he wasn't really doing either so he left and I said goodbye and went home shortly afterwards too. In no way do I believe that I wasn't in the wrong. In the morning I felt terrible about dragging him along on this night out and promptly apologized to him. I said it wasn't an excuse at all, but with how terrible I've been feeling and all the drinks I got caught up on the night out especially as it felt like a night back home. He said if i had fun then that's fine, but he doesn't want to have another night like that again (which is completely fair). If I could go back I would've declined their invitation or I would've at least said let's go do our own thing when I saw that he wasn't able to participate in the group fun at the third place. When we got back to work I said good morning to him and he flat out ignored me. I sent him an internal IM and asked if he was mad at me to which he responded that it would be more weird if he wasn't. I tried to explain to him that back home for me, nights out sometimes would include linking groups up, but that I was really sorry as I wanted to talk to him more. I apologized a couple more times for dragging him along on the night and he said he didn't think that I understood why I was actually upset. I asked him to explain and he said he would like me to think about it myself. I said I understood and that I can see how upset he is so I'll give him space until he's ready to talk to me. (I have gone over this a lot and I think the misunderstanding may come from me thinking we were closer than we actually were. For me, as he was my friend I assumed he'd tell me if he wasn't into something or that he would be up for a night out like that. I think for him he felt disrespected as a co-worker as he probably didn't believe we were on that level and for him a night out like that wasnt the norm at all. I did try and explain to him that because hes my friend I followed the night naturally). He's given me the silent treatment since then and didn't respond again when I tried to say good morning to him again a week later. I'm not sure how to navigate this situation as my trigger is being ignored as I was ignored all throughout childhood and effectively abandoned and I have a constant reminder of this sitting two seats down. We also work really closely together so I'm worried about the next few months in the current environment (there are two others that work closely with us that will eventually catch on to what's happening). Everyone I've talked to (that is completely removed from this) said I should've just apologized once and that I've done what I could. They have told me I'm not responsible for his feelings and that he could have left at any point (which I can see now and so I don't understand why he's so mad to the point of silent treatment). I'm really not sure how to navigate the situation and how to handle the emotional flashbacks this brings up.
I'm trying to be mindful of the catastrophising I'm doing by picturing him telling our other co-workers and everyone hating me as a result. I'm trying to enact thought-stopping/correction. It all already feels difficult as I've only realized how much healing I have to do recently with my first really bad emotional flashback. It's been difficult for me in this environment with my social anxiety and I'm scared it's going to get worse. I already have been struggling in the friend department here and it just feels like I really messed up. Do I tell the other co-workers or just leave everything alone and hope for the best? Is there anything I can do? Any advice/thoughts is much appreciated.
submitted by ch1ak1 to askatherapist [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:50 crackworry Todd Valentine - The System (Complete Course)

The System, a course created by Todd Valentine, a pickup artist and former instructor for Real Social Dynamics,
offers a unique and systematic approach to dating that can be used by anyone at any level, from beginners to more advanced artists.
The course covers topics such as:
Infields are also included!
The System is a highly recommended choice for improving your dating skills and enhancing your dating life.
If you are interested in The System by Todd, you can contact me through:
Reddit Direct Message
Telegram or WhatsApp at (+) 447593882116 (Telegram: multistorecourses)
Email: silverlakestore[@]yandex.com (remove the brackets).
submitted by crackworry to VerbalGamezAcademy [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:49 supernoodles97 Advice on what to do with our Dad

Hi!
So my Dad has been single for the long time since we lost our mum around 2013 from leukemia. We are three girls, im the youngest and most close to my Dad.
Background: Dad tried to see other women around his age 50s but didnt worked until he met a woman whos a year younger than him. They both clicked, had the same vibes, they both hv the same interests. They knew each other's dating history, Dad has only dated our Mum from uni (theyve been bestfriends from sec but only became officially a couple after uni), while Aunty (yup we call this woman that way and she likes that too, for now) had alr dated two guys and another one wc i'll share now.
So when Aunty has shared to Dad about the third guy she really liked before (she also shared that it's only Dad that she shared this about not even to her friends or family) but stuff happened and they still catch up during Aunty's home vacays. After learning about the third guy, my Dad suddenly got disheartened but claims he still likes Aunty, just that he felt like she still has feelings for that third man and still wants to catch up with him when her home vacay comes. Me and my sisters discussed about this and we come to our conclusion that our Dad felt insecure of the third guy bec theyre now dating yet Aunty still wants to catch up with this man? He openly shared this with Aunty and assured him that the man was from 15-20yrs ago. Im not sure if Dad is really okay with it, but my gut says no.
We rly want to tell Aunty that if she's still not yet over with that third guy, then just break up and be with him. Will that be rude? I would like to know ur opinion about this.
Tldr: dad is dating a woman who we think is still not yet over with her third guy that she never shared about except to our dad cos shes his bestfriend/lover, it's like a love that was not pushed thru towards the third guy bec of her limitations during that time (like repressed or smthg then resurfaced(?)] Then shared it with our Dad and he became insecure and felt bad about it esp wen Aunty shared oso that she wants to catch up with third guy on her home vacay soon (works overseas) despite dating him yet she assured him theyre just friends, the guy was from 15-20 years ago and would def choose my Dad cos "he's the best".
submitted by supernoodles97 to OffMyChestPH [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:46 Mydiamondhands 26m Struggling with a single unimportant event - months of spiralling thoughts about gf 23m

Hello everyone, I’m going to cut to the chase as I’m at wits end with how bad things have gotten: I met my gf almost a year ago. A year before that she had a hookup with a guy. He told her right after that he had a girlfriend.
A couple months into us dating, one night she doesn’t talk to me all day or reply to my goodnight message. She answers around 2am. The following day she says she had a conversation with a friend that needed to be had. Fast forward a few months & I ask about that time: she says it’s was with this hookup, they had dinner and she needed to tell him she was feeling used & how bad she felt overall.
I’m feeling horrible because so many questions are racing in my head: I don’t understand why she wouldn’t tell me before? I don’t understand why she had time to see someone for dinner but not to talk to me all day? Why did dinner end so late? Why didn’t she answer my messages during this dinner?
She said nothing happened. I believe her but in my obsessive thoughts I’m so embroiled into negativity.
We’ve discussed many times and she has been very open to conversation. I love her very much and I don’t want to lose her because I’m obsessing over something that could be inconsequential.
Do you guys see any solutions? What can I do? Do I need to have a conversation again? How do I approach it in order to solve it with her?
submitted by Mydiamondhands to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:43 AutoModerator The System by Todd (Complete Edition)

You can chat +447593882116 (Telegram/WhatsApp) if you want The System By Todd.
I have The System By Todd.
Todd Valentine - The System is a revolutionary course, created by the famous pickup instructor - Todd Valentine.
The System by Todd covers everything you need to know to play the game. This program is applicable for beginners, as well as intermediate students.
In The System by Todd you will learn how to OPEN (Open, Premise, Establish, Narrative) as well as much more on how to lead proper interaction with girls, and how to close them (infields included)!
Todd Valentine's The System is one of the best and most effective courses ever created on dating, and one of the best choices you will make if you have decided to improve your game.
To get The System By Todd contact me on:
Reddit Direct Message to u/RequestCourseAccess
WhatsApp/Telegram: +447593882116 (@multistorecourses)
Email: silverlakestore/@/yandex.com (remove the brackets)
submitted by AutoModerator to EverythingToddV [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:41 ch1ak1 Flight/Fawn Type made a mistake and now in triggering situation

TL;DR My co-worker is giving me the silent treatment, for a mistake I made, I find the silent treatment really triggering
I have a co-worker that we will call "L", I have been working in this job for about a year and a half and for the year and a half we'd have out-of-work celebrations for birthdays and going aways. I wouldn't say we were particularly close, but I would consider us all close for co-workers. I had a really bad emotional flashback about a month ago that made me realize I had a lot of healing to do. It was rough, I wasn't able to go to work a few days (as I wasn't able to eat or sleep and was having anxiety attacks) and when I was at work I was close to tears. One of these days as I was leaving work with L, I said I've been struggling for a bit and he said let's go for a drink. The night was really nice! We both opened up about our trauma and he echoed a lot of what I was saying. We made plans to go out again the next Friday. I mentioned that I had a dinner with the head of our office before we planned to meet and asked if he was fine to meet after that and he was. When we went to the first bar it was really packed (and too noisy to chat) so we had a drink and went to the next. At the next bar there was a group of Lacrosse players who invited us to join them for the next round and mentioned there would be Korean Lacrosse players too (L is Korean). I asked if he wanted to join and he said it was a new experience so let's go. L doesn't speak too much English (like the Lacrosse players) and so I was a bit worried (I did want to join them dont get me wrong), but we went. At the next place we had another round of all-you-can-drink and there was a lot of conversation that was happening in English. The aforementioned Korean Lacrosse players apparently went to bed early and so I could see that L wasn't the most comfortable. We finished up and I convinced L to come with us to the next round which was at a club. We danced and drank and as he wasn't really doing either so he left and I said goodbye and went home shortly afterwards too. In no way do I believe that I wasn't in the wrong. In the morning I felt terrible about dragging him along on this night out and promptly apologized to him. I said it wasn't an excuse at all, but with how terrible I've been feeling and all the drinks I got caught up on the night out especially as it felt like a night back home. He said if i had fun then that's fine, but he doesn't want to have another night like that again (which is completely fair). If I could go back I would've declined their invitation or I would've at least said let's go do our own thing when I saw that he wasn't able to participate in the group fun at the third place. When we got back to work I said good morning to him and he flat out ignored me. I sent him an internal IM and asked if he was mad at me to which he responded that it would be more weird if he wasn't. I tried to explain to him that back home for me, nights out sometimes would include linking groups up, but that I was really sorry as I wanted to talk to him more. I apologized a couple more times for dragging him along on the night and he said he didn't think that I understood why I was actually upset. I asked him to explain and he said he would like me to think about it myself. I said I understood and that I can see how upset he is so I'll give him space until he's ready to talk to me. (I have gone over this a lot and I think the misunderstanding may come from me thinking we were closer than we actually were. For me, as he was my friend I assumed he'd tell me if he wasn't into something or that he would be up for a night out like that. I think for him he felt disrespected as a co-worker as he probably didn't believe we were on that level and for him a night out like that wasnt the norm at all. I did try and explain to him that because hes my friend I followed the night naturally). He's given me the silent treatment since then and didn't respond again when I tried to say good morning to him again a week later. I'm not sure how to navigate this situation as my trigger is being ignored as I was ignored all throughout childhood and effectively abandoned and I have a constant reminder of this sitting two seats down. We also work really closely together so I'm worried about the next few months in the current environment (there are two others that work closely with us that will eventually catch on to what's happening). Everyone I've talked to (that is completely removed from this) said I should've just apologized once and that I've done what I could. They have told me I'm not responsible for his feelings and that he could have left at any point (which I can see now and so I don't understand why he's so mad to the point of silent treatment). I'm really not sure how to navigate the situation and how to handle the emotional flashbacks this brings up.
I'm trying to be mindful of the catastrophising I'm doing by picturing him telling our other co-workers and everyone hating me as a result. I'm trying to enact thought-stopping/correction. It all already feels difficult as I've only realized how much healing I have to do recently with my first really bad emotional flashback. It's been difficult for me in this environment with my social anxiety and I'm scared it's going to get worse. I already have been struggling in the friend department here and it just feels like I really messed up. Do I tell the other co-workers or just leave everything alone and hope for the best? Is there anything I can do? Any advice/thoughts is much appreciated.
submitted by ch1ak1 to CPTSDAdultRecovery [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:40 AutoModerator The System by Todd (Updated Program)

You can chat +447593882116 (Telegram/WhatsApp) if you want The System By Todd.
I have The System By Todd.
Todd Valentine - The System is a revolutionary course, created by the famous pickup instructor - Todd Valentine.
The System by Todd covers everything you need to know to play the game. This program is applicable for beginners, as well as intermediate students.
In The System by Todd you will learn how to OPEN (Open, Premise, Establish, Narrative) as well as much more on how to lead proper interaction with girls, and how to close them (infields included)!
Todd Valentine's The System is one of the best and most effective courses ever created on dating, and one of the best choices you will make if you have decided to improve your game.
To get The System By Todd contact me on:
Reddit Direct Message to u/RequestCourseAccess
WhatsApp/Telegram: +447593882116 (@multistorecourses)
Email: silverlakestore/@/yandex.com (remove the brackets)
submitted by AutoModerator to CompletedToddV [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:36 SponTen Choppy frame rate and issues after GPU update (G14 2022)

I've been having some issues on and off with my G14 2022, but they were fairly minor compared to what's happened since the latest update.
I always let Windows/ARMOURY CRATE/MyASUS just do the updates they determined best. However, I decided to see where RuneScape (RS3, not OSRS) was up to these days, and upon opening, was prompted that my drivers were out-of-date. Strange, but sure, I'll go to AMD's website as they suggested and do a manual update.
I downloaded from here and installed the Auto-Detect program. It proceeded to do a bunch of driver updates... okay strange, but sure whatever. My GPU driver version went from 31.0.12024.2005 to 31.0.14043.1000.
Then, after restarting and opening GW2... the frame rate was all over the place. What's also weird is that the in-game frame rate display was showing very few, if any, dips in performance. I thought maybe it was just GW2, but nope, same thing in Dark Souls, Grim Dawn, and I'm guessing any other game.
So I uninstalled all the AMD stuff, and the issue reduced, but still persists. Additionally, I'm sometimes getting weird white screen flashes, or issues with YouTube where the video will slow down to like 1/4 speed for a few seconds before returning to normal.
Has anyone had this issue before and resolved it, or have any suggestions? I guess I can do a factory reset, but man that's a mission, and I'm wary of it not even resolving the issue if it's driver-related.
submitted by SponTen to ZephyrusG14 [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:35 KingHuge19 23 years old. No girlfriend. No close friends. And am starting to realize it’s not good.

Title sums it up. At 23 I’ve never had a girlfriend. I’ve never dated, made out, banged, nothing. When it comes to confidence I don’t think I’m lacking. Other than one girl in high-school, I have never had a girl that I genuinely wanted to go out of my way to get to know more personally. Also after talking to other dudes my age apparently I have next to no sex drive, all they talk about is women who they find attractive. Don’t get me wrong if I see an attractive woman I’m not numb. I get the same feelings anyone would, I just get over it almost instantly rather than keep thinking about them. Either way. I’ve started becoming more and more noticeable of how not normal never having a girlfriend is at 23. Even just a hookup, or even a date. I also don’t drink, smoke or party. My life consists of work. School. Gym. And that’s it.
As of now I have two major concerns. One is I hate going on dates despite not ever have been on one. I don’t have an issue with small talk, quite the opposite, every girl I’ve ever talked to for more than a few days has ended up always going into deep personal stories, which I’m fine with, but I don’t really know why they all seem to open up to me, but the amount of trauma and personal stories I’ve heard from girls I have had no relationship qualities or attachment to is surprising. But the main reason I hate dates is because traditionally they don’t leave room for anything more than small talk if you connect with someone. I think eating somewhere as the main event is dull. It’s not a money issue. I just think there’s more entertaining things we could do. Also I have zero interest in going on dinner dates constantly. I’d much rather go walk, explore, shit I’d take driving around the city and just talking for a few hours over a restaurant.
Second major hurdle. I have zero sexual experience. I have no way of practicing so if I do every manage to find a girl willing to bang. It’s likely going to be a disaster unless she’s cool with teaching or help me understand what she needs to enjoy it. Also making out seems more difficult than boning in my mind, it just seems awkward. I’m praying for a girl who I just connect with that likes to stay home, snuggle and relax. The problem is me finding someone.
I’m just worried that in the next 7-8 years if I don’t find a partner my insane goal of having s family of my own is not physically going to be possible.
submitted by KingHuge19 to confessions [link] [comments]


2023.03.28 09:33 PriorityEmergency109 I feel broken, thank you for reading

Some Background:
I am, besides being in a DB, in a very happy marriage. I love my spouse and she loves me. I am a HLM and she is an LLF. Before we got married I was given the impression she had no medical issues, and had at least a somewhat normal libido but just needed time to warm up to me. Because we are religious (btw for religious reasons I cannot masturbate, and I have always known that I am hypersexual or at least a HLM, which makes it very hard) we weren't intimate until we got married, and it took her several weeks to do the deed which was my first indicator of LL. After trying to be intimate she was in searing pain, I had never seen someone in so much pain from intimacy, and that pain didn't change after trying two more times at which point I said we needed to go see a doctor. Doctors were so unhelpful and wasted our time for nearly a year during which time we weren't intimate at all, until I got fed up and decided to go to the best of the best.
The expert we saw immediately said it was clear she had a somewhat rare condition that required surgery (vestibulodynia). We had the surgery and Thank G-d it was successful. Before surgery she got off of her BC and while she was recovering we hadn't had intimacy. After several months of recovering she stopped having her period which was clearly concerning and we went to another specialist who discovered she also has PCOS and is undergoing treatment for it now.
I love my wife very much and I do my best to buy her flowers, jewelry, and chocolate, take her on dates at least once or twice a month when our schedules permit and generally do my best to go out of my way to make my wife feel cared for, loved, secure, and the like. I write her cards and try to make her laugh. I spend time with her and with her family and I generally ask for feedback on things I can improve upon.
When it comes to sex, I have always had a very high libido, I started watching porn when I was 8 and started masturbating when I was 11 and had many sex partners (always monogamous and one at a time) until I became religious. It took me a tremendous deal of effort to stop masturbating and redirect my sexual desires and energy into productive tasks that would at least somewhat act as an outlet (waiting for marriage to be my outlet). For the 6 years I was unmarried and religious I found myself fighting and wrestling my sexual desires for anywhere from 1-3 hours daily, which is a crippling experience in the sense that during those hours I feel so consumed by sexual desires that all I can do is find activities to release my anger and scream. Even with many healthy outlets of various means (regular exercise, diet and sleep, learning in my freetime, meditation, playing instruments, and spending time with family and friends) it takes every ounce of my willpower to not give into my temptations to masturbate, look at porn, or entertain seeking a relationship outside of the bounds of marriage. I looked to my future marriage to save me from this daily struggle, or at the very least to make it feel manageable.
After getting married I thought that maybe she just needed time to warm up to me when at first she didn't want to be intimate. Then I thought that she needed her condition healed before we could really start to work on it. I began to realize that for sure she has LL when she healed and we started planning on being intimate, she made every effort to push it off day after day, week after week, month after month and now year after year. After speaking about it with her, it makes sense that having rare conditions certainly contribute to her aversion to sex and intimacy so we went to therapists. We've been to CBT therapists, social workers, trauma therapists, sex therapists, and now a somatic therapist. All have tried to help the mental portion of the healing process with little progress. The main advice I've been given by all of the therapists? DO NOT INITIATE. Why? Because apparently she is so traumatized (understandably so after a lifetime of vaginal pain that everyone, including doctors told her was made up) that she needs to be the one to initiate in order to not feel pressured, anxious and scared.
In addition, she didn't have her period for 6 months which had us seeking out yet another professional/specialist who has diagnosed her with an uncommon form of PCOS and is giving a holistic approach to healing, which is another layer of difficulty for my wife.
I've gotten married, but I feel like not all of me is married. There is this part of me that wishes nothing more than to feel wanted, needed, craved, lusted for even just a little bit. I thought, maybe foolishly, that marriage would be my way out of fighting myself 3 hours a day. I have been intimate 9 times in 3 years, I finished in none of them, and all of the times were less than 10 minutes. I tried for the last 3 years to continue to fight myself and my urges, I have tried to give my spouse space and time to heal, I have spoken about this with her many times, and with therapists many times, and recently, after 8 years of fighting myself everyday, I felt something break, something snapped inside of me, I feel a heaviness on my heart that won't go away, and it's just so unlike me. I've never ever understood how someone could take feelings with them from one day to the next without letting go. And now for months I have tried letting go, meditating, giving to myself with healthy outlets and trying to empower other parts of the relationship. And no matter how much I try, it feels as though all my efforts get thrown into an empty abyss of brokenness and unfulfilled dreams, desires and needs. I feel unwanted, I am hurting, and worst of all I feel numb.
I put on a smile the next day, I say that everything is going to be okay. I know I'm so happy and truly overjoyed with 90% of the relationship, my wife is my best friend and I go out of my way to find ways to bring our relationship fulfillment, and yet I experience this deep disgust and guilt for even entertaining the idea of being sexually wanted.
There may be light at the end of the tunnel. I know that there are ways to improve LL and my wife is very open to figuring it out...after we take care of PCOS which will be another 6 months to a year of work to overcome the symptoms that would prevent her from conceiving.
When we discuss the issue she feels bad and then offers to give foreplay, but it feels so forced and fake. When she says she wants to initiate she clearly does not evidenced by the delay tactic. When things actually do happen it's for a short while and she is lifeless during the act. The therapists we've worked with have given tons of tips, tools and advice that just don't treat the underlying issues of trauma, and thank goodness she is getting therapy for the trauma, but the healing process is long and difficult.
I know I am repeating myself but the experience is soul crushing and I feel repulsive for even wishing to entertain the surface of my needs and desires.
Summary and request for advice:
Even though there is that chance that her LL can be improved, my numb, broken heart feels as though the wait until that happens with maybe a 10 minute obligatory intimacy per year until we get there is just so unsustainable. I am used to being uncomfortable and like I'm starting to break down, but I always just fought myself kept going. I've turned to counselors, therapists, spiritual guides and as I see it the only answer Infront of me is to get harder, to tie up my broken ass heart and keep fighting my raging desires, keep telling myself just one more day, and keep doing my best to put on a smile.
I love my wife more than life itself and so I am willing to go through a lifetime of this, but if anyone has practical advice on making it even a shread more bearable it is welcomed.
Please keep in mind that I am very communicative with my wife, she knows how I feel (to an extent because I think she is for the moment incapable of really understanding me no matter how many times and ways I express it), we have regularly worked with therapists and are looking forward to trying things that might increase her libido.
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2023.03.28 09:28 delphinium_cottage Delphinium Cottage - garden progress

Delphinium Cottage - garden progress
We like to do it old school! The border has been dug over so to get it ready for planting, we 'tread the bed'. Take small steps and use your heels to break up any clods and lightly compact the soil. We'll then gently rake over it to level it and the border will be all set for planting. Think we've got a bit of a way to go on this one!
https://instagram.com/delphinium_cottage_wyorkshire?igshid=ZDdkNTZiNTM=
Delphinium Cottage is based in Leeds, West Yorkshire and will be open to the public in June/July - dates TBC. Some plants will be available to buy and tea, coffee and cake will be on sale. All profits will be donated to charity.
You can follow our progress on this profile or for more regular updates at https://instagram.com/delphinium_cottage_wyorkshire?igshid=ZDdkNTZiNTM=
submitted by delphinium_cottage to GardeningUK [link] [comments]